The Art of Slowing Down and using rest as a restorative practice.

A hot topic of conversation with women at the moment, is the feeling of rushing around to complete a to do list, to feel more productive etc.

You know the feeling of needing to rush to have everything completed by the end of the year. This is felt in particular around Christmas time. Wrapping up work projects, setting goals for the new year. Feeling like everything needs to be done before you can put your feet up and relax.

Or maybe you start the year with a long list of what you want to achieve, and you dive head first into a gigantic workload realising you didn’t rest much at all.

As someone who has been a high achiever in a past life, and as someone who now knows the power of a more slower and intentional way of living and working, rushing is definitely not good for the soul.

As Mae West once said:

It was in August last year, I was sitting down overlooking the ocean, it was quiet and serene with the distant sounds of children laughing and playing. The smell of sea air and birds chirping around me, enveloping all of my senses.

Was the moment I realised I wanted to do more writing, and how happy I was that I shifted the way I worked to make the space for creativity in my business and life.

My family went back to a place called Villa Botanica in Airlie Beach where my husband and I were married, for our 10 year wedding anniversary. We took our girls to see where we tied the knot, so they could experience some of the magic of our special day.

We walked around the venue and remembered the day we said our vows. It was a really beautiful remembrance of our wedding and was really special to experience it with our children.

Our stay was in five star apartments that we stayed in for our wedding, called The Pinnacles. Right on top of the hill, overlooking a stunning view of Airlie Beach. It was one of the most restful holidays I’ve had in a very long time. The view, the sea air and a new environment can do so much for shifting the senses.

Despite all the wonderful things to do, we were happy to stay in our apartment on the balcony just enjoying the view. We had a big pool, so we didn’t really need to go anywhere, but it was a time to just sit back and take things slowly. The slow mornings turned into slow lunches to slow afternoons. Our whole schedule went askew as the girls were going to bed late which threw their entire schedule off, but it was perfect. Everybody needed a reset.

Is it time for a reset?

You now might be thinking that your family needs a reset. Not only yourself, your partner, if you have children, they need time to rest too.

Rest does so much for our soul. Especially when we leave technology behind. I took my computer but didn’t look at it once. I didn’t feel like I needed to. I had my Kindle Scribe, which I’m a huge fan of.

If you love reading and you love writing, whether it’s journaling or you’re trying to get everything in the one spot and have all your notes in the one place, the Kindle Scribe will be your best friend. It is my favourite business tool, because not only can I read on it, I can also simultaneously take notes. A creatives dream!

I love rest. Not just physical rest, but emotional , mental and spiritual rest, where all of me has a deep restoration. I feel it is such an important part of our lives where we can re inspire creativity, and get back to who we are.

I have always spoken about taking regular breaks and is something I encourage my clients to do- throughout their week and the month, however this was a next level restoration and brought my nervous system back to baseline.

I could almost feel my body take a big sigh, any tension in my body just melted away.

I wasn’t expecting such a break could bring so much peace and joy, purely through taking intentional time off.

Because, let’s be honest, when you have a career that you love and a business that’s thriving, it is easy to get caught up in continuing to keep going and not take that time off. I feel that knowing when to stop (and not feeling guilty for it) is key to a more peaceful life.

Softening into yourself

During one morning on our break my husband had taken our girls to the playground. I was having a quiet moment to myself on the balcony, with my organic decaf coffee, book and notebook, and I realised how much the art of softening and slowing down has transformed my life.

The more we rush, we miss the special moments. We lose the sense of peace for the adrenaline rush.

If you are a mother, you will know at times rushing around can be a part of your life, but there are ways to slow down. What happens when you’re rushing, you’re not completely taking everything in your nervous system. You miss special moments. You are moving through life at a pace where you can’t keep up for a long period.

It is rare to be able to truly take deep breaths and lean into the now.

It was at that moment on the balcony when I made a promise to myself. That I would be even more intentional with my actions, my words and my pace than what I was doing.

I have intentionally moved my days around to create space so I’m not rushing around. I have space (and peace) to create, write, read and enjoy myself as well as working on my business, and in my business.

Making those changes has given me so much more energy in my mornings.

If this resonates, I want you to think about where are you rushing? Are you taking the time to eat your breakfast slowly, to read a book, to do some exercise, or just.. breathe?

Reconnecting with yourself

Each week I will ask myself, how can I create more calm to bring me more peace and joy? How can I schedule more intentional time off?

Rushing has become such a badge of honour for some to do more and get more work done. Coming from a corporate environment it is ingrained to meet performance metrics, reach your targets and work until you get the job done.

But rushing didn’t help my nervous system. It is not going to help me get more done. You may not even get the task done to the best of your ability. So sometimes it’s actually better to slow down and to actually take your time and do things properly, or even just enjoy that extra time.

There’s no rush.

Softening, not striving

People are always rushing to the next destination, the next big milestone in their career or their next big business milestone. But what happens is when we’re truly present in the now, that’s really important. We take in a lot. We have a lot of insights come to us. We become more grounded in our connection to ourselves.

We can get more done when we’re present because we’re focusing on one thing at a time, rather than five things at a time. Slow, sensual mornings are my thing now. Despite having children, I make it a non negotiable for me, despite homeschooling and running a business.

We have slow mornings, mainly myself and my older daughter. My youngest daughter is my little firecracker. The minute she wakes up, she’s up and on and doesn’t stop all day.

My 7 year old daughter takes her time. To eat, to read, to play. She takes her time to get ready. She’s probably more like me. She doesn’t like to rush, but when she feels like she has to rush to get out to an appointment, she becomes frustrated if it disrupts her routine and sense of peace.

Slow mornings for us are really important. And it’s a way to bring more connection and purpose. I also love long solo walks to start my day when I can.

So, back to my restorative break.

It was a really restful time. I didn’t go into this holiday thinking it would be this intentional to not look at my computer or not do any work.

I really love my work and what I do and I consider work as an extension of me. My brand, my business is an extension of me, but it is not who I am as a woman and I know when to stop. To pause. To choose creative rest over chaos. That is the key right there.

The one thing I always do when I am on holiday is to take a notebook so I can write. Writing and reading help me fully integrate into rest and peace.

Creating the space to thrive

If you listen to my podcast The Woman Beyond The Business, you will often hear how I am a huge advocate for people to take time off and once a week have those weekly meetings with themselves to reconnect and reflect.

And when you do this as a practice and as something that is part of what you do, it becomes something of a ritual that you do for yourself.

Then it becomes a really great way to create that space. Sometimes it’s not enough for people and you do need to take those longer break. That is when you need that intentional time off where you are just focused on what you need, what you desire, where you want to go.

It all comes back to reconnection. When we rush, we disconnect, we become disembodied. I think it’s really important that if you’re losing connection with your why, that you take a creative sabbatical. Whether you have to work during that time or whether you go away for a weekend and have that intentional time where you just create and sit and reflect.

You’ll be surprised what comes through to you when you have that space to listen. Having that space for peace and joy will give you so much more in help you reconnect because you are the leader of your life. While you want to share your gifts and have a beautiful life, you don’t want to (or have to) rush through it.

But when we don’t make the space to reconnect to what we we truly want, we are constantly in a state of doing, when what our soul is really craving for us to be, is in a state of being.

If you would like to begin to soften into a more feminine way of working and living, you can download my Reconnection guide here.